reflection

I have had an especially trying day today. I am a little sleep deprived (my own fault- not because of the kids) and have struggled keeping my temper in check with Blake. All day I have been on edge, I think he has noticed. He does the same old things he usually does but it just seems to hit my wrong cord. When Brad got home tonight he let me leave the house and have some "me" time. When I returned he said Blake was actually pretty good. I feel bad that I let my anger get the best of me because Blake is so little and I know he wont be this way forever. My mother-in-law always says its a season of life and wont last- so enjoy and play.

Now that the kids are in bed I have some time to reflect on how good my life is. I have a wonderful, hard-working, loving husband who does so much for me and is my better half in every way. Two gorgeous kids that challenge often me and play/snuggle with me whenever I ask them to ;) They teach me patience and unconditional love daily.  And an amazing job that I can do from home and contribute to our income that is perfect for me. I am so blessed. I often feel inadequate when I have days like this today and think that I am a bad mom and not doing my job. I try to keep an eternal perspective that these children are children of God and chose me knowing that I am not perfect- but perfect for them. They chose me- and I am SO grateful. I was putting Kaitlyn to bed today reading a recent conference talk "Behold Thy Mother" by Elder Holland. It reads"No love in mortality comes closer to approximating the pure love of Jesus Christ than the selfless love a devoted mother has for her child." When having the feelings of inadequacy that I have been having lately, this was a reminder that I am loved as much and more than I love my children by Jesus Christ and he blesses me with the same experience of the pure love of Christ. I love my family.